I have to be strong. I can't allow myself to be weak anymore. I cannot allow myself to be the victim anymore. For far too long I have submitted to this title and for far too long I've been defeated by the demons of my past. I can't let this happen anymore. I tell other women to be strong and independent when all along, behind the scenes, I'm just a fucking baby in swaddling sheets crying for her mama and papa to come and fucking rescue her. I need to be the independent one. I need to stop depending on friends - for they are not always there. I need to stop depending on him - for he is rarely there. I need to stop depending on family - for they have enough problems of their own. I must carry my own burdens and stop crying to other people about them - for how else could they possibly desire my friendship? The person that I've become, right now... no one wants me. I don't even blame them. I barely want myself.